Customer Relations and the "News" Propaganda Game

Rule Number 1- The customer is always right. 

Rule Number 2 - If the customer is wrong, see rule number 1

 These are the rules that most supermarkets live by.  I know because I worked in that industry for 14 years.  I say most supermarkets because Icelandic ones have never heard of these rules. If they ever had to face real competition from a US supermarket they wouldn't last a week.  But that is a subject for another time.  Anyway, supermarkets (outside of Iceland)  have some serious competition and very fickle customers so pleasing the customers they have is a very big deal.  And if some of those customers tell them they do not approve of something then the supermarket usually does something about it to keep those customers happy. This is the job for the Customer Relations Department. (non-existent in Iceland)  What they need to do is satisfy these customers in a balanced and of course, economical, way.  This is not alway easy.  Case in point.

During the first Gulf War there was a large demand for yellow ribbon.  Tie a yellow ribbon 'round the old oak tree to support the troops.  The management of my company was fearful our customers would think we were making a profit from the war so they removed all yellow ribbon from the shelves.  Good solution, right? Wrong!  Some customers complained that our stores were unpatriotic for not having yellow ribbon on the shelves. So a solution had to be found so that it would look like we were not making a profit but being patriotic.  The Customer Relations Department came up with a brilliant solution.  Give away long strips of yellow ribbon to each customer for free.  It didn't cost very much and people really appreciated it.  Problem solved.

Now you are probably wondering what all that has to do with the UK supermarket Waitrose protesting Iceland's whaling quota increase.   Waitrose is fearful of losing customers because some have complained about them selling fish from Iceland, the terrible whaling country.  So they need to find a solution to the problem, balanced and as economically painless as possible.  After all where else are they going to buy their fish,  from Norway?  With the Pound hitting new lows ever day, Waitrose is getting a bargain buying from Iceland. Enter the Customer Relations Department. They organized a little field trip, otherwise known as a publicity stunt.  They sent their executives to Iceland to talk to the Minister of Fisheries and to ensure that local suppliers do not have links to whaling. And guess what they found out? It is best to hear it from them-

"I can categorically confirm that none of our Icelandic suppliers have links, directly or indirectly, with the whaling industry," said Jeremy Langley, specialist fish buyer at Waitrose.

What a surprise.  So they complained to the minister and ensured the fish has never touched a dead whale.  But how do they let their customers know about their good deeds and allow themselves to keep buying cheap fish?  Just get it printed in the paper as a "news" article.  I'll  bet a thousand kronur (not so much anymore) that they contacted the Guardian and not the other way around.  Free publicity.  It doesn't get any better than that.

This is what this story is really all about.  It is and never was a threat to stop buying fish from Iceland.  It was about a way to keep buying fish from Iceland and cover their asses. They call it Customer Relations but it is just the "news" propaganda game.


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